


Adventures in Human-sitting

by templecat



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Fluff, Gen, Humor, M/M, human!Cas, slight bits of angst when I just can't help myself, snapshots of life in the batcave
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-07-10
Updated: 2013-07-13
Packaged: 2017-12-18 09:07:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/878087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/templecat/pseuds/templecat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cas needs a bit of looking after as he gets used to his new species, Dean is more than happy (most of the time) to teach him the Ways of the Humans and Sam watches on in amusement.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A life or death situation

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: So these mini-fics will be set in the Batcave unless stated otherwise. I'm trying to avoid too much angst here but sometimes I just can't help myself. So this will be mostly fluffy, funny (hopefully) snapshots of life with human Cas. I've already got a few of these things written so expect frequent updates.  
> Enjoy!

 

“Dean! Dean, wake up!”

Dean sprang out of bed into the semi-darkness, keen eyed and alert, a gun appearing in his hand as if conjured. He looked at Castiel, who stood before him still in his pajamas, panic making his eyes wide. “What is it?”

“I think I’m dying.”

“Wh- what?” Dean lowered the gun slightly, sensing that the danger scaring the ex-angel was not going to be eliminated by bullets. “Cas, what the hell is going on?”

Castiel gestured towards his throat, fear and confusion making him seem wild. “There’s something invisible attacking me. It stabs me in my chest and sends something up my throat.”

Dean ran his hand through his bed-hair and put his gun on the bedside table, turning on the lamp. He stepped closer to Castiel and looked him up and down. As he was staring at his chest for signs of an invisible knife-happy imp Castiels body shook, his shoulders bunched up and he let out a sudden high-pitched ‘ _hic!’._

Castiel pointed at his throat again, finger wagging in alarm. “It happened again!”

Dean stared at Castiel in silent amazement for a minute. Then he slowly reached up and slapped the ex-angel on the back of the head. “You have _hiccups_ you moron! God, you’d think millennia of watching humans would teach you the basics at least.”

“I am aware of what hiccups are. But this doesn’t feel like... they always looked...” he trailed off and tilted his head. “Are you sure?”

Dean sighed and said “Yes. You’re not dying. Go back to bed.”

“But – _hic!_ –how do I stop them?”

Dean shrugged, suddenly feeling very tired and realising he’d only managed to grab two hours sleep before he was so rudely woken. “You can wait them out.”

“How long will that take?”

“I don’t know. An hour maybe?”

Castiel shook his head as another hiccup shook him. “I do not like hiccups. Is there not some sort of treatment?”

Dean clambered back into bed and pulled the covers over himself. He shoved his face into his pillow and tried not to curse about newbie humans who wouldn’t let him sleep. “Hold your breath.”

“For how long?”

“Until the hiccups stop.”

It was silent for a long moment before Deans curiosity got the better of him and he turned to look at Castiel. Cas stood there, a serious expression on his face which even in the dim light of the bedside lamp Dean could see was beginning to turn a rather violent shade of red. “Stop- Cas stop, you’re going to make yourself pass out.”

Castiel blew out the breath he’d been holding in a loud splutter and sagged forwards in exertion. He drew in several deep gulps of air before another loud _hic!_ shook him. He looked annoyed and in an accusatory tone said “That didn’t work.”

With a yawn Dean replied, “You could try drinking a glass of water upside down.”

“Does that work?”

Dean had no idea. “Sure.”

“Am I upside down or the glass?”

“You.”

“I’ll be right back.”

Castiel padded out of the room, hiccupping as he went and for a few short, glorious minutes Dean lay in silence. He had nearly managed to drop back off to sleep when a loud bang, the sound of shattering glass and curse word that should never come out of an ex-angels mouth broke the silence. 

Another _hic!_ announced Castiels return. Dean tried not to smirk when he caught sight of the now rather wet ex-angel. Castiel rubbed his elbow and Dean spotted a lump forming already. He grinned. “No luck?”

Castiel scowled. “I do not trust your treatments. I think it might be best to simply- _hic!-_ wait it out.”

Dean tried to keep a straight face. “I think that’s probably a good idea.”

Castiel was quiet for a moment, before asking, in a quieter voice, “Dean... can hiccups make you stop breathing?”

There was more weight behind the question than there might have appeared, Dean knew. Ever since his change in species Castiel had been preoccupied with his very human need to breathe. For weeks he wouldn’t go near water, avoiding even the bath like it held molten lava. He hadn’t slept for longer than an hour or two a night either; all that time unconscious where he couldn’t be sure whether or not his body would keep doing its job. He tried not to show it but Dean could tell the notion that one had to keep drawing air into ones lungs, even when sleeping, terrified him. Angels didn’t need to breathe; humans were so much more fragile. Anything could happen.

Dean held Castiels gaze and promised “No, not that I know of.”

His answer didn’t seem to ease what was clearly worrying away at Castiel. He’d developed a habit of holding his hand still at his side and rubbing his finger and thumb together when he was worried. He would never ask but Dean sometimes wondered whether he was feeling for feathers that were no longer there.

A loud hiccup brought Castiel back from his worries and he glanced at Dean. He looked apologetic and said “Thank you for your help Dean. I’ll leave you to sleep now. I’m sorry I woke you.”

He turned to leave and Dean, cursing himself internally but unable to stop himself, said “Cas, wait.”

Castiel turned back to stare at him. He looked so tired.

Dean bit his lip. “I’ll keep an ear out. Make sure you keep sucking air.” He pushed the covers over to clear the space in the bed next to him.

“Dean, you don’t have to-“

“Just shut up and get in the damn bed.”

Castiel hiccupped and tried not to smile. He nodded gratefully and quickly slid under the covers next to Dean. The springs sagged under his weight and Dean tried to ignore the way he was now fighting to roll into the warm space between them. He reached up to turn off the lamp and muttered “You better not snore.”

The light clicked off and they were plunged into darkness. Dean, as always, kept his eyes open for a few minutes, to let his eyes adjust to the dark. Next to him Castiel lay motionless except for the steady rise and fall of his chest, his breathing low and quiet. He’d fallen asleep almost immediately.

It was only as Dean was drifting off himself that he realised that Castiel hadn’t hiccupped once since getting into the bed.


	2. Pirates vs Princesses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short and sweet, sorry. And I rejigged the chapter order if you're confused.

Dean sighed, setting down the sizable green box on the table next to Castiel. “You’re not an angel anymore Cas.”

Castiel looked petulant. “I am well aware of that Dean.”

Dean sat next to him, pulling his chair in close to the table. “You know what I mean.” He began opening the box, pulling out various assortments of first aid supplies. “It’s not just that you can’t heal yourself anymore; you have human coordination. You’re clumsy.”

“I am not-“

“Dude you slipped in the shower. That ain’t exactly angelic.”

“At least I didn’t die.”

Dean laughed, opening a packet of antiseptic wipes. “You’d have to be a real klutz to kill yourself by slipping in the shower.”

Castiel smirked. “Indeed.”

Dean frowned, bemused by the smile playing at the corner of Castiels lips. He shook his head. “All I’m saying is you need to be more careful.”

“I a _m_ -“ Castiel gasped as Dean cleaned the shallow wound on his forehead.

“Baby.”

Castiel scowled. “I _am_ careful. I just forget that you humans are so fragile.”

“You’re one of us now too dude. You’re lucky the cut is small; headwounds can be real bleeders.” Dean finished cleaning the wound and pulled out two boxes of bandaids. “Now we ran out of bandaids and these were the only ones they had left at the store.”

Castiel eyed the boxes dubiously. “I find that difficult to believe.”

Deans eyes danced. “Prove it.” Castiel pouted, but said nothing. “So,” he continued, trying to maintain a serious expression as he help up the two brightly coloured boxes, “pirates or princesses?”

An utterly murderous expression flitted across Castiels usually stoic features before he blew out an exasperated sigh and said “Princesses.”

Dean let out a bark of laughter. “Seriously?”

“Yes. I have never understood your cultures admiration of pirates. They murdered, pillaged, raped and had terrible personal hygiene. I would much prefer to have a princess on my face than a pirate.”

Dean made a choking sound then burst out laughing. “You and me both buddy.” Castiels brow furrowed slightly but he remained silent as Dean unwrapped the bandaid and smoothed it carefully over the cut. “All better!”

Castiel reached up to touch the pink plastic and smiled. “Thank you.”

Dean smiled back kindly and opened his mouth to reply when Sam, still messy with sleep, walked into the kitchen. Spotting the bright shiny bandaid over Castiels eyebrow he asked “What’s with the pink?”

Dean kept his face straight. “Cas has a thing for princesses.”

Sam huffed and headed for the coffee maker. “I’ll be sure to get you a crown for your birthday then.”

Dean spluttered and Sam smiled. Sometimes it was too easy.


End file.
